Cooperative Divorce Law

Chicago and Oak Brook Divorce Attorneys - The Cooperative Approach

Cooperative divorce law has just arrived in Illinois. It is our newest anti-war settlement process. Cooperative divorce joins mediation and collaborative law as our third alternative to fighting it out in court.

The purpose of mediation, collaborative law, and cooperative divorce law is to guide divorcing parties through the dissolution process in a way that enables them to reach an out of court settlement.

All three methods aim to minimize the length, cost, and frustration that are commonly attributed to the divorce legal system. They have the same goal, but they go about it differently. This blog post will explain how each works and how they differ from one another.

Mediation is where a divorcing couple negotiates the terms of their divorce in the presence of a neutral and impartial third-person – a mediator. The mediator assists the parties by directing their conversations in a way that allows them to put their best foot forward.

Divorcing parties who seek an out of court settlement must persuade one another to accept settlement terms that the other party does not want to accept. This involves compromise; and compromise involves salesmanship.

In order to be persuasive, each party must be at his or her best. This is difficult because divorce is a time when both parties are emotionally overloaded and are likely to be at their worst.

The mediator acts like a control tower, and directs the parties’ conversations away from confrontation and toward open-mindedness and acceptance.

If the couple is able to reach a mutually acceptable marital settlement agreement in mediation, they are urged to hire their own lawyers to review the settlement terms. Typically, at least one of the parties engages the services of an attorney to shepherd the divorce through the legal system.

Collaborative Law and Cooperative Divorce Law operate along the same lines, but both parties have attorneys who are present during the actual settlement discussions. The attorneys commit to attempt to create and maintain an atmosphere of sensibility that will promote settlement.

Collaborative and cooperative divorce attorneys have mediation or comparable communication skills training, and employ similar peace-keeping techniques as are used in mediation. The vast majority of the work that the attorneys do is in the presence of the clients at settlement meetings.

The attorneys pledge to use their energies to help the parties achieve a sensible, out of court settlement, and they orchestrate the emotional flow and tone of the discussions accordingly.

If the parties are not able to reach a settlement, cooperative law attorneys may go on to represent their clients in the court system. Collaborative divorce lawyers, on the other hand, are barred from litigating on behalf of their clients. The clients must hire new attorneys to represent them in court.

Many divorce lawyers are mediators, cooperative divorce practitioners, and collaborative lawyers, but can only serve in one of these roles with any given client. The choice of which method to use is determined by the needs and circumstances of the divorcing couple.

How Do I Keep My Divorce Friendly? Part III

Purpose of DuPage County Illinois Divorce Attorney Blog

In Part II of this “How Do I Keep My Divorce Friendly? Part II” post, we suggested acting nicely toward your soon-to-be ex as a means of helping you reduce the length, pain, and expense of your divorce.

This doesn’t work in every case, but it never hurts to give it a try. In fact, there is no downside to the “nice” approach. When you are trying to persuade your spouse to agree to an out of court settlement, you are really attempting to get him or her to give you something that they would prefer not to give to you.

This is the essence of sales, and we are merely suggesting that you do what salespersons have been doing for centuries: Be nice to the customer and entice them to see things your way.

This blog focuses on the nice approach to divorce settlement conversations between spouses. It will contain over 200 tips regarding the specific things that you can say or do to maintain a cooperative, non-confrontational demeanor when you are discussing settlement terms with your partner.

We do not suggest that you be nice because we want you to be devoted to your spouse’s interests. We want you to be nice so you can accomplish your best interests.

Business is business and the nicer you are is the better businessperson you are. Since over 90% of all divorces reach a settlement before the trial ever starts, it is in your best interests to start working on a settlement immediately.

The nice approach allows you to do this, and our traditional, adversarial approach does the opposite – it leads to added delays, added expense, and added suffering to the family unit.